Starting counselling for the first time can feel like stepping into the unknown. It’s natural to wonder, “Is there anything I should do beforehand?” or feel unsure about what to expect.
The good news? You’re not alone. Many people share these thoughts, and taking this step is a significant move towards improving your mental health and well-being.
In this guide, we’ll explore how to prepare for counselling, what to expect in your first sessions, and practical advice to help you make the most of this journey.
From managing expectations to clarifying your goals, these tips are designed to empower and support you as you begin counselling for the first time.
1. Ask Questions—Curiosity Builds Confidence
One of the best ways to feel at ease before your first counselling session is to ask questions. The more informed you are, the more comfortable you’ll feel.
There’s no such thing as a silly question when it comes to therapy. Here are some examples of common questions clients often ask:
- How long have you been practising as a counsellor?
- What is your approach to counselling?
- Will you give me advice or let me figure things out myself?
- How confidential are our sessions?
- What happens if I miss or need to reschedule an appointment?
- Do your clients typically notice improvements?
If you’re unsure of what to ask, jot down your questions before the session. You can ask them during your appointment or even email them beforehand.
Remember, therapy is a collaborative process, and your counsellor is there to guide you.
During your counselling sessions, you’re in charge of how much you share. Feeling comfortable with your counsellor is what matters most. And remember, there are no silly questions when it comes to therapy!
2. Know Your “Why”
Why are you starting counselling? Identifying your motivations and goals is an excellent way to prepare for your first session. Most counsellors will ask, “What are you hoping to gain from therapy?” during your initial meeting.
Spend some time reflecting on what brought you to counselling. Are you seeking support for specific challenges, such as stress, anxiety, or relationship issues? Or do you want to explore and understand yourself more deeply?
Creating a list of topics you’d like to discuss can help you focus and feel more prepared. For example:
- “I want to feel less anxious at work.”
- “I’d like to work on my self-esteem.”
- “I’ve been feeling stuck and want to explore why.”
Having these goals in mind isn’t about creating rigid expectations but rather giving you and your counsellor a starting point to work from.
3. Keep an Open Mind
Starting counselling can be both exciting and nerve-wracking. You’ll discuss feelings, thoughts, and perspectives, which may involve exploring unfamiliar territory.
Having an open mind is essential. It allows you to consider new viewpoints and approaches without judgement. Personal growth often comes from challenging old ways of thinking and embracing the possibility of change.
While you don’t have to accept everything immediately, staying open to new ideas can lead to breakthroughs and a deeper understanding of yourself. This mindset will serve you well throughout your counselling journey.
4. Reflect on Your History
Understanding your past can be a valuable tool in therapy. Before starting counselling, take some time to reflect on significant life events, relationships, and patterns that have shaped who you are today.
Ask yourself:
- Are there recurring themes in my relationships?
- Are there emotions or situations I try to avoid?
- Are there memories that feel unresolved?
You don’t need to have all the answers, but exploring these questions can provide valuable insights to share with your counsellor. Together, you can work on understanding how your past influences your present.
5. Be Patient: Counselling Takes Time
Counselling is a process, not a quick fix. While it’s natural to hope for immediate solutions, it’s important to remember that meaningful change takes time.
Consider the timeline of the issue that brought you to counselling. If it developed over months or years, it’s reasonable to expect that working through it may also take time.
Building trust with your counsellor is another gradual process. It’s okay if you don’t feel completely at ease right away—relationships, even professional ones, take time to develop. Patience is key to making progress.
6. Don’t Worry About What to Say
Many first-time clients worry about what to say during their sessions. The truth is, there’s no “right” or “wrong” thing to say in counselling.
Your counsellor is there to guide the conversation and help you explore your thoughts and feelings. If you’re struggling to articulate something, it’s okay to simply say, “I’m not sure how to put this into words.” Your counsellor will work with you to navigate these moments.
Remember, therapy is a space for you to be authentic. Whether you’re sharing a well-thought-out concern or expressing confusion, it’s all part of the process.
7. Schedule Time Around Your Sessions
Life can be busy, but carving out time before and after your sessions is a small step that can make a big difference.
Arriving early can help reduce pre-session anxiety while taking a few minutes afterwards allows you to process what was discussed. Post-session reflection is especially important, as you may experience heightened emotions or new insights that need space to settle.
Practical tip: Bring a notebook to jot down key takeaways or thoughts after your session. This can help you track your progress and prepare for future appointments.
8. Be Ready for Emotional Ups and Downs
Counselling often involves exploring deep emotions, which can lead to moments of vulnerability. While this might feel uncomfortable at first, it’s a natural part of the healing process.
Some sessions may leave you feeling uplifted, while others might stir challenging emotions. Both experiences are equally valuable and contribute to personal growth.
To navigate these emotional ups and downs, practice self-care outside of your sessions. This might include journaling, meditation, or talking to a trusted friend.
9. Understand That Counselling Is a Collaborative Process
Therapy isn’t about passively receiving advice—it’s a partnership between you and your counsellor. Together, you’ll explore challenges, identify solutions, and set goals.
Don’t hesitate to share feedback about what’s working and what isn’t. If a particular technique or topic doesn’t resonate with you, let your counsellor know. Open communication is key to creating a positive and productive therapeutic relationship.
10. Manage Expectations
It’s important to approach counselling with realistic expectations. While it can lead to profound change, the process is often gradual and requires effort both in and outside of sessions.
Rather than expecting instant solutions, focus on small steps and gradual improvements. Celebrate the progress you make, no matter how small it may seem.
11. Find the Right Fit
Not every counsellor is the right fit for every client. If you don’t feel comfortable or supported after a few sessions, it’s okay to explore other options.
A good therapeutic relationship is built on trust, empathy, and mutual respect. Finding the right fit might take time, but it’s worth the effort to ensure you’re getting the support you need.
12. Prepare for Your First Session
Feeling prepared can help ease first-session nerves. Here are a few tips:
- Write down your goals or concerns.
- Make a list of questions for your counsellor.
- Familiarise yourself with the logistics (location, session length, cost).
- Practice self-compassion—it’s okay to feel nervous!
Final Thoughts
Starting counselling for the first time is a courageous step towards self-improvement and healing. While it’s natural to feel apprehensive, preparation, patience, and an open mind can help you make the most of the experience.
Counselling is a journey, and every step—big or small—brings you closer to greater self-awareness and well-being. Trust the process, stay committed, and remember: seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
Low Cost Online Counselling
Our low-cost counselling service gives you access to private therapy for only £29. Just follow these two simple steps to access our affordable counselling service.
Step 1: Go to the self referral contact form below.
Step 2: Complete the form to book and secure an initial free consultation.
It’s as simple as that. One of our team will contact you within 24 hours to discuss your needs.
